Where’s The Harm In Flirting?Author: +Freddie Cook
Let’s face it, if someone you like is flirting with you. . . it’s not just fun. . . it’s EXCITING!
And most of the time it is, but. . .
. . . is flirting with AN EX supposed to be fun?
How should we take it when an ex flirts with us and what exactly could it mean?
Well, let’s dig into your question. . .using breakup psychology might be useful too.)
The Reasons Your Ex Is Flirting With You
First of all, some people like playing games, mind games in particular. One of their tactics is to use flirting to mess with your head. They are trying to invoke a reaction from you. They might be doing it to make themselves feel better, or they may just like messing with your head.
Be careful, because, if you respond to their flirtations by flirting back, they are likely just to use you for the fun of it and then dump you all over again.
You should be well aware if your ex is this sort of person or not. If they are, be grateful you’ve split up and ignore them completely.
. . . Are you repelling your ex? Take this quiz and find out . . .
Secondly, and it’s not much better, your ex could be flirting with you because they are not in a relationship at the moment and they see you as an easy “temporary” solution.
Perhaps they just want someone to go out with.
Perhaps they just want sex.
Perhaps they just want to prove to themselves they can still get you whenever they want.
Again, you should know if your ex is capable of this or not, and if they are — keep well away from them.
Thirdly, the reason your ex is flirting with you could be because they are still in love with you and genuinely regret the breakup decision. They want you back again. (see this post: Using Psychological Triggers To Fix Your Breakup)
They too are looking for a reaction or response from you.
They are testing the waters rather than ask you directly if you would like to give your relationship a second chance.
They don’t want to face the possibility of being rejected. This one, it’s up to you whether you want to rekindle things or not. Just be careful not to give your ex the wrong signals.
Lastly, and again, you will have to judge this for yourself, your ex may simply be extremely comfortable with you.
If your ex was used to flirting with you when you were together and you’ve both remained good friends since your breakup, then it might just be the way they are used to communicating with you.
They may simply feel comfortable enough to flirt with you, even though they know you’re not getting back together again. It’s just a form of friendly banter.
If you are uncomfortable with this, then you should be upfront with them and let them know that you don’t think it’s appropriate to flirt when you’re not dating anymore.
So, how do you tell the difference?
Well… that turns out to be fairly simple.
When someone is interested in you they’ll give off lots of signals, In this article I’ve put together 24 signs your ex wants you back.
The point is that, if your ex is flirting with you because they really desire you and want to get you back into a meaningful relationship, then they’ll be giving off body language signals as well.
Whereas someone who is just trying to torment you will not be giving off any of these other signs.
That makes me think how everyone handles a breakup differently. The one being broken up with usually comes off the worst, but that doesn’t mean the one doing the breakup isn’t affected at all.
There are usually feelings of doubt and guilt involved. Your ex may even have bouts of regret or go through phases of having second thoughts. I’m serious, these are all common feelings for the one doing the breaking up.
Sure, some people are ruthless and never give their ex a second thought after they’ve broken up. But most people have more feelings than that and they question themselves and their motives. They also question their feelings… a lot.
I hope this has helped answer your question, “why does my ex flirt with me?” And if you secretly want to get your ex back, you don’t have to wait for them to decide… simply find out how to plan and get a second chance with your ex boyfriend … or get a second chance with your ex girlfriend all by yourself…
. . . Your 2nd chance, the complete plan - Get started now . . .