Playing games? Be convincing…
There are basically three ways of getting another person to do something you want them to do. You can force them into bending to your will, manipulate them or convince them.
Most reasonable people will pick the last one. But that leaves their final choice up to them. You can give them all the reasons to make their choice in favor of what you desire, but in the end you are letting them make up their own mind.
However, that’s not always good enough for some. They don’t want to take the chance of not succeeding.
Forcing someone against their will can be very difficult, and dangerous, for all sorts of reasons and will be kept for a future discussion.
For this post, we’ll concentrate on manipulation… mind games, and better alternatives.
Some people appear to be very good at manipulating others. It seems that it just comes so natural to them. Perhaps they were born with this instinct or maybe just learned at a very early age that it works.
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Either way, should manipulating your ex be used as a method to get them back?
There are better and longer lasting ways to get your ex back, no mind games are required to achieve this. Messing with peoples heads is one of the worst things you can ever do.
Whenever you have been dumped and want to get your ex back, don’t be tempted into becoming some sort of control freak. Stay well clear of playing mind games, or any games for that matter.
They may very well work initially, but if they work for any length of time it will become really tiring trying to maintain it after you are back together again.
If you can remain unemotional and friendly whenever you manage to contact your ex, then this will prove a far more effective, not to mention a much nicer, way to achieve your aims. Text or call them once a week or so, this will keep the lines of communication open in a pleasant more attractive way.
Effective communication is so important in relationships and is especially so when you are trying to have your breakup fixed and get your ex back.
Remembering important dates like birthdays can be really helpful as it not only gives you an excuse to contact them, it also shows that you still care about them.
A small gift would be beneficial as well, but nothing flashy, keep it small.
Don’t show any jealousy if your ex dates another person, to do so would make them feel as though you still have claims on them and will work against your efforts in getting your ex back.
Some people will tell you to find out what you can about the person your ex is dating so that you figure out what type of person they are really looking for.
This is not very reliable though, there are too many variables for it to make any useful sense.
For instance, after a breakup, some people start dating those that are the complete opposite of what their ex partner was like, these dates don’t usually last very long.
You also have to remember that you were once the type of person that your ex was attracted to, so be that person again and you will stand a better chance of rekindling your relationship.
If you are serious about fixing your relationship and getting your ex back, then don’t go dating others, it sends the wrong message to your ex.
It is okay to go out and enjoy yourself, especially with friends and family, just don’t overdo it unless you are happy to walk away from your ex forever. Do you really want your ex back?
People give off messages through the use of body language all the time.
They are not usually aware that their actions are significant, but if you watch carefully when you are in the same company as your ex, you might be able to see some of the tell-tale signs your ex wants you back.
This is very common, so if you do see signs your ex wants you back, then a lot of the work to get your ex back has already been done.
Don’t be to easy to get, in other words, try not to appear that you are really eager to get back with your ex.
If you do, you run the risk of becoming a safe bet to rely on only when there are no other options available, so when they have no-one else to go out with or to go to a concert with, they know that ‘good old you’ will be on hand.
Don’t become a ‘patsy’, you will be handing too much power over to your ex.
Stay as independent and confident as you can. These are attractive features to hold on to and may well be all you need to swing the balance in your favor.
During the time when you are broken up, work on yourself. and raise your standards a bit. Your personal appearance is more important now than it ever was.
Stay up-to-date with news and current events, the music scene, and all the things that you ex has an interest in. This will stand you in good stead whenever you are both together.
Remember, get your ex back, no mind games. In the end, you have a decision to make. You can try to get your ex back by manipulating them, or you can try to fix the problems that your relationship had and give them a reason to come back.
When you work on your relationship problems, you will build a more solid foundation for the future after you have succeeded in reconciling with them.
Just remember, there are far better ways of using psychological triggers to rescue your relationship that don’t involve mind games…
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Getting back with your ex doesn't have to be difficult!